Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Believe In Thyself

The Courage to create...the courage to step outside your comfort box and do something outrageous but life changing. A few years ago I had envisioned myself having a blog. A place to share my art and perhaps motivate others to create. It always seemed like I found a reason to stall. I wasn't ready, my art wasn't good enough, lacked the motivation, etc. Finally I told myself, it's now or never. Why are you so afraid? Do you not have the courage to create? It took one thing and that was believing in myself. 
Last month, a month ago exactly, I ran my first half-marathon. I was afraid. Of What? That I wasn't prepared? Maybe I would pass out half way through? No one to give me a hug or high-five at the finish line? A sense of self pity? All these questions followed me up into the week of the race. Days leading up to the race I told myself, your good enough. You need to put on your big girl pants and BELIEVE in yourself. How else do you manage to conquer goals in life if you're always afraid? 
So I packed my bag and off I went to the hotel. Race day was full of adrenalin and race ready people. The fears were gone and that is when it truly sunk in. I'm here. I'm alone but I'm not. I'm prepared. I'm not a quitter. Learning to believe in yourself changes the whole game of life. So I think. I ran a solid run, beating the time I had predicted and it was the BEST feeling EVER! Tears of happiness and tears of defeat.

That 7 o'clock a.m. race on a crisp cool Sunday morning changed my life. Little did I know how big of an impact it would be. Believing in myself isn't just something I say. Week after week of pondering a blog name I started Starbella Creations. It was a huge emotional oh my gawd I'm doing this (!) step for me. After years of reading my favorite blogs I now sit here writing my own. Life is amazing. 
And so on Day 5 of Art Journal Wisdom I chose Believe as my word. A word that has set the tone and helped me get where I'm at today. We were limited to using purple of any shade, one word and found leaves. I started with oil pastels then layered with acrylic paint. This process I have never tried before and love how smoothly the paint glided over the pastels. Found leaves from the balcony and neighborhood trees and the flowers were given to me by a friend. Day 5 defiantly made me think twice about everything in life. Art journaling daily, making greeting cards and being a mother to a blog has really changed the path I'm on. I'm finally seeing a clear picture and purpose in life. Some days are hazy but I continue to fight through them. I've probably said this before and will say it again, I'm so grateful to have discovered Dirty Footprints Studio and other amazing bloggers/artist. Thank you World Wide Web?! Yes, thank you! 


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